Dear Suz, I'm reeling from a recent date. The guy was great over the phone and we shared common interests so we met for lunch. He said he was a complex person, open to new experiences, and he wanted to share some with me. He made me swear that I wouldn't laugh and told me that he got off watching women use the toilet -that the tinkling sound, the facial expressions and even the smells aroused him. He asked if I would do that for him. I thought he was pranking me, but nooooo. Totally for real. I was pissed (not enough to demonstrate in front of him). Is he a pervert?
Dear Pissed, Pervert generally means morally wrong, degenerate, or to cause harm, none of which is the case here. The technical term is "urolagnia" and is considered a kind of kink fetish, or "watersport" where 4% of the population is sexual excited by urine/urination. In the US, it’s not a mental disorder nor illegal between consenting adults. Thank the gods that we've advanced a long way from classifying things we don't understand, or think are offensive, as abnormal or unacceptable. Watersports may not be for you, so tell him so, and move on to someone with like interests. -SQ
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