CAN Old Dogs Learn New Tricks: Dunning-Kruger Effect

Dear Readers, I often hear legitimate complaints from people who are miffed that someone with a bit of knowledge acts like they know it all.  Sometimes, it's just part of puffing yourself up to look good in the eyes of another who you are trying to impress. Sometimes, though, it's damn aggravating if their whole personality operates like this. It’s called the Dunning-Kruger Effect when people overestimate their limited knowledge or abilities. Who it hurts most is the person themselves because they don't know that they don't know their deficits, so they continue to look like braggarts rather than improving themselves and their skills. Naturally, it hurts the rest of their contacts if the idiot is actually put in charge. Trick is, never put a blowhard in charge unless he's brilliant and knows his shit. -SQ

No Sex

Dear S. Q. My 30 year-old, college-educated daughter is navigating a new world in which both of our knowledge and experience is like falling down a rabbit hole. By her age, I was a sexual diva with a hot career and distance thoughts of marriage and kids. She's struggling to find a descent job with any kind of benefits, piecing together gigs and short-term contracts. And sex -her 20 year-old boyfriends were jerks (no different than mine) but she and her friends abstain rather than enjoy the hell out of lovers and losers. Where's this headed?

Dear Mom, Let's start with sex, never a dull topic. The world's attitude toward sex has always had its ups and downs, from buttoned-up Victorian, to Roaring 20s flappers, to 1970 Flower Power (remember the birth control pill was introduced in the 1960), back to sex fears of AIDS in the 80s, to the introduction of the internet and explosions of all sorts beginning in the 1990s. True that sex is significantly down worldwide, and true also that fewer young adults are in relationships where sex regularly occurs. There are no simple reasons for the shift our young are going through, but plenty of speculation. Where it's headed is where it always has, some glorious unknown, where us elders hold their hands until they let go, and support their good choices thereafter. And, naturally, "Home is the place where, when you have to go there, they have to take you in." -Robert Frost and S.Q.   

CAN Old Dogs Learn New Tricks: Confirmatory Bias

Dear S.Q. I’ve stopped listening to U.S. national and international news. This government makes me sick to be an American. I argue on-line with people who used to be friends but think Trump is a god and dismiss facts that make him unacceptable as a leader. Who’s crazy here?

Dear American, No one’s crazy but many have succumbed to “confirmatory bias.” This is defined as believing new information that only agrees with their views; follow news and social media that shares their belief or spin facts that support their narrative; refuse to consider opposing perspectives; and dismiss all logical and rational facts disagreeing with their conviction. 

Why does this happen? Because it’s easy. It’s easy to believe what you believe, share a comfy conversation with like-minded friends, feel righteous (with pumped up self-esteem) knowing others think as you do. So, WE must be right. Right? Wrong. Not challenging your own conclusions when opposing facts emerge is lazy thinking. And we all do it. The trick is to recognize when you are doing it and decide if you want to put in the extra mental resources to make an informed, logical opinion of value or remain brain-dead. -SQ

AI Intrusion

Dear Suze, My iPad just alerted me that Gemini Apps, an AI Google service has been added without my permission for 48 hours and recommends I keep the setting “on” so my chats pick up from where I left off “and helps improve Google services, including AI models.” Why the fuck is AI taking over my computer?

Dear Used and Abused, AI is everywhere and national and international regulations and laws are not ready to deal with safeguarding the consumer. To prevent Gemini pop-ups, go to Settings ➡️ Apps ➡️ Default Apps ➡️ Digital assistant app. Tap on Device/digital assistant app, and select None or Google Assistant (instead of Gemini). One disabled robot at a time. Power to the people. -SQ

CAN Old Dogs Learn New Tricks: Anchoring Bias

Dear SQ, My husband and I have young children and have decided to buy our first dog. He can’t let go of the idea of a chihuahua, remembering his sister who raved about her "chi-chi." I’ve read they can be aggressive to people and other dogs, snapping when threatened. My husband thinks they’re friendly if raised right. 

Dear Mom, Because your husband keeps reverting to this breed, despite your information that the dog could be dangerous to your children, is a sign that something else is going on. Perhaps he’s overly influenced by the first piece of information he heard -the praise of a chihuahua from his sister, which is termed an “anchoring bias." This dog breed became "anchored" as the correct and only choice. Allowing the first random piece of information to act as the ultimate answer often leads to wrong choices, possibly this one. Trick is, acknowledge his anchor, that this dog is great, but not for your family. Insist on considering other breeds that loves children, not "ankle biters" that threaten to hurt them.  -SQ

Hic Sunt Dracones (Here be Dragons): Part 2, p. 423-424

 

"While sexbots are already here and will continue to evolve, the simple truth is that we are 100 percent human and we are 100 percent complex, social creatures who are also evolving. We survived other species and tribes by cultivating trust, intimacy, friendship, cooperation, curiosity, and love. These things cannot be equally replicated with machine-learned algorithms. When we stare into the eyes of a potential mate, the hormones flow, the synapses spark, and the imagination spins. Eyes of glass and breasts without hearts cannot transmit empathy, the glue that holds us together, any more than a silicone body can substitute indefinitely for the unique, imperfect entity we call human. But, as we solve some of these problems and new ones emerge, keep your eye on the dragons for they know where the dangers lie. 

I hope this little thought exercise was entertaining and you'll enjoy the rest of my debut novel, available on Amazon, Cyber Frogs And Princes: A Sex Manual Of On-Line Dating After 50 by Suze Q.  Cheers, S.Q

Mismatched Sense Of Humor

Dear S. Q. My sometimes girlfriend thinks we should see a relationship counselor because we have mismatched humor styles. She’s very much a girly-girl (fashion, extravert, and social media butterfly) and laughs at anything, I’m an engineer who’s pretty squared-away although I like a good intellectual mind-bender. She brings out my energy and I love her, but seeing a counselor? How will that help? 

Dear No Joke, Similar sense of humor maybe the least of your problems. Are your true connections to others mainly intellectually and her’s social? A relationship counselor could delve beyond the humor differences and reveal other problems or common connections. Do you really want to look deeply at yourself and your relationship? Only go if you’re willing to do the hard work of self-insight. -SQ