Dear Suze, my partner’s holiday party is at a Mexican restaurant where some spouses come but most don’t. My guy adamantly doesn’t want me there but gives lame excuses like he just needs to put in an appearance, it’s only for 2 hours, and it’s not a big deal. We don’t socialize with these people nor does he on his free-time. Is he ashamed of me?
Dear Unwanted. Why is this about you? Why do you want to go, and why aren’t his reasons for you not to go good enough for you? Unless there’s a legitimate trust issue (like he has an emotional interest in a co-worker), why intrude on his work world? If you’re worried he’s ashamed of you, you better nail down this issue before buying him a nice Christmas gift or a lump of coal (and consultation for a divorce). -SQ
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