Dear Suze, My wife complains I shut down when we bicker. I do because we start off with one topic and then I’m fighting every argument we’ve ever had. She follows me when I try to leave the room. I can’t win and I feel trapped.
Dear Trapped, You both drastically need to change the rules of engagement and learn to fight fair. Rule #1: Stick to only one topic per argument. Rule #2: When overwhelmed during the argument, take a brief time-out, if needed, to be alone. Before you leave the room, tell when you will resume the discussion (within 24 hours). For further Rules of Fair Fighting, read my blog from June 14 & 15, 2024, and search your library, internet, and bookseller. Turn your no-win arguments into productive problem-solving successes. -SQ
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