Hi, Suze. I really like a gal I met on a dating site, but she complains more each time we're together and I'm worried she's going to turn out to be a whiner. How can I speed this up to find out if I'm overthinking?
Dear Thinker, Whining is a behavior, often learned and OUTGROWN in childhood, that excessive complaining about something trivial makes people pay attention to them. On your checklist of "compatibility," add a few questions that assesses how needy your gal is, such as: "Do you like to be alone?" or "What do you feel when ignored?" Also, find out what failed in her other relationships. Important questions shouldn't be an interrogation, so use laughter and teasing to make sure you get the information you need. If this relationship goes tits up, consider it good practice for the next candidate. -SQ
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