Dear Ms. S.Q. I’m the ass that you wrote about yesterday. I didn’t mean to slap my girlfriend and I apologized. I’m profoundly sorry and at 30 years-old I have no excuse other than it was an accidental mistake and I’ll try to never lose my cool like that again. You suggested she leave me forever but also gave the choice to see a therapist together. How can I get her to do the counseling thing?
Dear Ass, Most American states euthanize a dog that bites once. If you slapped a co-worker once, you wouldn’t be given a second chance -you’d be fired immediately. You could get counseling, but it would be on your dime, your time, and for your benefit because your old job would be gone. If you slapped an acquaintance once, the consequence could be assault and battery, and jail time. With these examples in mind, let’s look at your request. How can you “get her” -stop there. If you “get her” to do “the counseling thing,” by force or control, it’s still intimate partner violence. You say you have “no excuse,” but the slap was “an accidental mistake.” Oxymoron, try again. You’ll “try to never lose your cool again?” "Try” isn’t good enough. One strike, now you're out. -SQ
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