Dear Suze Q. I’ve had enough. The kids are grown, and the marriage is cold. I found a job, but my husband said no way. He’s a corporate guy who makes his own hours, entertains clients with dinners and drinks and who knows what else. I’m not interested in counseling. I just want my own life before I’m too old to enjoy it. I only have a little money saved and I know he’ll stop me from leaving by saying I’m crazy (or worse) and cut off resources. Crying in California
Dear Crying, Luckily, California is a no-fault (no reason needed for a divorce), community property (half the money and assets from the marriage are yours) state. Glue yourself to good legal advice and support until you live apart and you’re strong on your own feet. At your first court date ask for immediate alimony funds until you can become self-sufficient. Be sure this is the path you want, then enjoy your journey. Embrace the ups and downs inherent in metamorphosing into a butterfly. -SQ
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