Dear Suze Q. I’m in my 60s and finally got my 20 years overdue divorce. I married the princess of my dreams, had great kids now married with their kids, and a dynamic, successful career. Happily, I left behind the job and the spoiled, entitled, princess that loves herself more than she ever loved me. But she won’t leave me alone -she cajoles me for minor repairs to our family house, reminds me of a grandkid’s birthday, asks me to be her Plus One. I hate the few times that I caved in to sex.
Dear happily, This period has been referred to as “crazy time” after divorce when one partner can’t move on or let go, and keeps the other person (you) engaged. YOU must disengage. Out of courtesy tell her why, and that she isn’t to contact you further. Mean it and don’t respond. Like a broken record over and over, do not respond. Although she probably is lonely and wants your familiar company, don’t give her positive vibes like you have been -that will only make things worse and turn her into your stalker. -SQ
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