Dear Readers, A mentor in my early psychology career recently died. He was an influential figure with friends, admirers, and colleagues even after his retirement years ago. Although our contact was generally Christmas cards, I was honored to stay in the loop of family news. His sons posted a short announcement of his passing on his social media site with plans for a future celebration of life, welcoming all who wanted to attend. I responded with a private message to the sons, and they replied with a personal note and emoji 🖤.
I marveled how different, efficient yet warm, this notification of his passing was compared with only a few, short years ago when a family member would inform someone in the inner circle, who told someone else, someone else… Heartfelt sympathy dribbled in for months with cards, flowers, drop-in friends, with and without food and stories, so that grieving and healing was so raw that getting on with living was interrupted. Social media is a marvelous mechanism for simplifying in a personalized post the pain of reporting a great loss. The message is open to interpretation because there are no Miss Manners rules for this 21st century life event. What are your thoughts, Readers, on right and wrong etiquette? -SQ
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