Dear Suze Q. It happened again. We’ve lived together a few months and getting the ground rules set. We agreed to absolutely, always, put down the toilet seat. I point it out when he doesn’t, and he says sorry and changes for a day or two. I’ve decided to give in, give up and just put the seat down. Why am I the one that has to change?
Dear Why? You have to change because you want peace over bickering. He knows you want him to change his behavior, so why doesn’t he? He’s not malicious/mean/lazy/stupid -it’s just not a priority, so he’ll do it, if he remembers. Or, if you decide to hold him to the agreement, throw down the gauntlet, and pick your fight. Use only fair fighting rules: time-outs if needed/hold no grudges after/no name-calling or blaming/discuss this topic only/offer solutions. Or, since it means more to you than him, put the seat down and never mention it. Ever. -SQ
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